Funny Face (1957)

“When I get through with you, you'll look like... What do you call beautiful? A tree. You'll look like a tree.”

            I work at a library. There is this one guy that comes in every few days and takes out quite a few movies. I would say he is in his mid-forties he is not like over fifty percent of the people that come who are well above sixty. This guy is pretty cool. He knows I like movies so we talk about the movies we have watched in the past few days since we last saw each other. I would say for the past month he has been telling me to watch Funny Face with Fred Astaire and Audrey Hepburn. He has been kind of raving about. Funny Face is a film I put on a mental list of films to eventually watch. I did not have high expectations for it and dragged my heels. I only really watched it because it did not run very long and not because of the guy’s ravings about it.

            Maggie Prescot is the editor for Quality Magazine. She wants something new for her magazine it is becoming stale and dull and boring. Maggie sees a role of pink fabric and decides that pink will be the color to celebrate that year. She then goes to her photographer Dick Avery (Astaire) to see what he can come up with the photograph all the pinkness. The environment of the studio is not working and neither is their model Marion for that matter.

            By two taxies they come to an old hole-in-the-wall bookshop and barge right in to create their shoot. The only other person in the store is an employee named Jo Stockton (Hepburn). The poor girl gets pushed around and nearly panics into high gear when Maggie has her girls mess all the books up. Maggie thinks placing Jo next to Marion will be good for shoot so she grabs the girl and puts her in the frame. After the chaotic storm of the photo shoot, Dick stays behind to help Jo clean up. He likes her and kisses her before he leaves.

            Back at the magazine, Dick and Maggie look over the proofs of the photos. Dick likes Jo’s face. He and Maggie both think she has a funny face and think they can make it work as the new face of the magazine. They get her to come to the office where Dick manages to talk her into going to Paris with them for a while to take photos and introduce a new line from a clothing designer.

            Things happen, Dick falls madly in love with Jo, Jo kind of falls madly in love with Dick, something stupid happens that makes them both mad at each other, he has to win her back for his sake and for the sake of the magazine, Jo thinks things over and comes to an epiphany, and the two come together happily ever after.

            I am not a fan of Audrey Hepburn. I have watched a number of her films some of which I have come to own. She was not a terrible actress but there is something about her I cannot get into. I did not really like Hepburn in this film. Maybe it was the character, maybe it was the way she was playing the character I do not know. Fred Astaire really does nothing for me either. He is the type of actor that I do like but I will only really sit through is films if there is an actress in it with him that I really like (ex. All his films with Ginger Rogers I will watch because I love and adore Ginger).  Astaire is obviously a great dancer I do not think there is one dance number I have seen him in that I did not like. I loved the number Dick danced with Maggie at a beatnik party. The actress who played Maggie was fantastic she was amazing in the way she kept right in sync with Astaire.

            I love photography. In the opening credit there are a series of photographs of the model Dovima (who plays the model Marion) and another model Suzy Parker. I nearly fell on the floor in a fit of excitement when I saw in the credits that the photographs were by Richard Avedon. Avedon is one of the reasons why I love photography so much. A few years ago I saw an exhibit of his works at the International Center of Photography in New York City. His photographs are pure class, pure amusement, and pure fun. Dovima and Suzy Parker seem to have been two of Avedon’s muses. They were beautiful and perfect for the setting Avedon created. He captured their elegance but also their normality. Simply put Parker and Dovima looked like goddess of fashion yet they appeared to be approachable. I highly, highly suggest looking up Avedon’s work especially his photographs with Dovima and Parker and also looking up each model.

Dovima with Elephants by Richard Avedon, 1955. This is one of Avedon's most famous photographs and one of the most iconic in photographic history

Suzy Parker and Robin Tattersall, Place de la Concorde, Paris by Richard Avedon, 1957. This photograph is one of the reasons why I fell in love with Avedon's photos. 

            Seriously, I was so bored with Funny Face. The story to Funny Face was alright and the songs are not really that memorable, well to me they were not. I really did not have any expectations going into this film even though the guy from the library constantly talked it up. I keep my expectations low for Fred Astaire and Audrey Hepburn films. I only suggest watching Funny Face if you are a fan of either Fred Astaire or Audrey Hepburn.

            

How to Steal a Million (1966)

“It's National Crime Prevention Week. Take a burglar to dinner.” 

            I like to think that if I was smart enough, sneaky enough, and ballsy enough I could be an art thief. So much art in the world is already stolen. Hell, the Metropolitan Museum of Art their entire Cypriotic collection is stolen and so are the friezes and statues of the Parthenon in the British Museum (the artifacts were taken by archaeologist before there were laws governing archaeology so technically they are stolen from what I understand). I would like to be like Parker and Sophie from the show Leverage who are both art thieves. Parker is a cat thief she knows how to bypass all kinds of security and break into places; I think I would enjoy being like her.

            If it had not been for my love of art (I have a degree in Art History)or watched Leverage there is no way I would have watched How to Steal a Million. I am not a big fan of Audrey Hepburn but I have already tortured myself with quite a number of her films so what was one more. I was surprised I actually liked sitting through the film. It helped that Peter O’Toole was outrageously handsome.

            A man named Charles Bonnett has just sold a Cezanne painting for a great amount of money at auction. The sale generated a great deal of publicity. The only thing that worries Bonnett and his daughter Nicole (Hepburn) is that the painting is a fake. Bonnett is a master forger. Nicole and her father heard and see police cars coming to their house. She thinks the police are after her father when in fact they are just escorting museum personnel who are there to collect a statue for their latest exhibition. The statue, the Cellini Venus, is supposed to have been sculpted by an Italian sculpture during the Renaissance when in fact it was sculpted by Nicole’s grandfather and the model her grandmother. Nicole tries everything she can to get the statue away from her father before he can let the officials take the statue to the museum. She even goes so far has to try and break it a few times.

            That night, while Bonnett is at the grand opening of the exhibit, Nicole hears someone breaking into the house. She goes downstairs to find a man (Peter O’Toole) stealing the Van Gogh painting on the wall. He says he thought she would be at the opening. Nicole grabs an antique gun from the wall and threatens to shoot him although she has no intentions of really shooting him just scare him. Unfortunately the gun goes off knocking Nicole to the floor and shooting the man in the arm. In the kitchen she puts a bandage on his arm. He says he is too weak to get back to his hotel she needs to drive him. Nicole is not happy with the idea but does so because if she tells on him she will expose her father. On the way to the hotel he tells her his name is Simon Dermott and that he is a society thief. In reality Simon is actually an art detective. He has been hired to look into Bonnett as a forger selling his art works for a great amount of money.

            Bonnett has made the mistake of signing an insurance document for the museum worth a million dollars. This document states that in order for the statue to be insured a specialist has to come in and validate that it is real by dating it. If it is tested they will automatically know the stone is not as old as they are claiming it to be. Nicole comes up with the idea to steal the statue without her father knowing. She goes to Simon to enlist his help. Simon of course says yes and comes up with a plan.

            Through a great plan and hilarious circumstances Nicole and Simon are able to steal the statue from the museum. Simon tells Nicole who he really is but that he will not be arresting her since the statue was a fake and was given to a crazy American man who was willing to do anything for it.

            Audrey Hepburn actually did not annoy me in this film. There is something about her that annoys me in some her films but I thought she was very good here. I could have been pleasantly distracted by her costumes that were designed by Givenchy. I loved all her clothes they were so chic.This was the first time I have ever seen Peter O’Toole in a film. I liked him a lot he was a very good actor. His eyes were gorgeous I could not stop staring at them!! Charles Boyer makes an appearance in the film. He is only I believe in one scene. I knew it was him before the camera showed his face, I would know his accent anywhere. Eli Wallach plays the guy who gets the statue at the end. His character Davis Leland was annoying. I know he was essential to the ending but the film could have done without him I thought… which could be due to me not really caring too much about Wallach as an actor.

            How to Steal a Million is a little long and got a little boring during the heist but for the most part it is fun to sit through.

            If you are wondering what I would steal if I was an art thief I would steal Madame X by John Singer Sargent in the Metropolitan Museum. That is my favorite painting. I would also steal Sargent’s copy of the painting from the Tate Britan as well a ton of Edward Steichen’s prints. 

Breakfast at Tiffany's (1961)

“I don't want to own anything until I find a place where me and things go together. I'm not sure where that is but I know what it is like. It's like Tiffany's.”
“Tiffany's? You mean the jewelry store.”
“That's right. I'm just CRAZY about Tiffany's!” 

            Breakfast at Tiffany’s was a film that before I saw it I had never planned on sitting through. How did I come to see it in the first place? Well in college I belonged to the film club and on Wednesday nights the members got to pick a film and show it. A girl in the club decided to show Breakfast at Tiffany’s. By this time I had seen so many not only weird films but films I never thought I would have sat through in a million years so I thought why the hell not give this one a chance. Also I wanted to see what the big freaking deal was with this film since it is talked about or, whatever, all the time.

            I probably do not have to write out a whole summary since hopefully many of you reading this have seen it. Audrey Hepburn is the iconic flighty, light, and incredibly entertaining Holly Golightly. Holly is a society girl who parties with all the best of New York society. One person does not know if she comes off as real or fake. George Peppard’s character Paul Varjak moves in next door. He is taken with Holly because he gets to see her social side and her vulnerable side away from the crowds. They are both unhappy with the way their lives are going at the moment but they both do the best they can. To me Holly is like the girl that most girls would like to be like the girl who seems to flitter through life without a care and seems to be liked by everyone. As we see this type of girl underneath has an emotional vulnerability.

            Too many things go on in the story to go into too much detail but what I said is basically the main idea.

            My favorite scene was Holly’s reaction when Paul took her to a strip club and the woman took off all her clothes. The look on Holly’s face is hysterical. I died laughing when Holly threw a huge party at her apartment where she sees this lady about to pass out on the floor from drinking too much. Holly yells out “timber!” to let everyone know that this lady was falling down! My friend and I were laughing so hard I loved it. We wanted to through a party like Holly’s we thought the people were what we dubbed “sophisticated drunk”… if ever such a thing exists.

 

 

            If you are a frequent reader of this blog and have read about the other Hepburn films I have seen you definitely know I am not a big of hers. Breakfast at Tiffany’s is the reason why Hepburn is so famous and so well known and what made her an icon. That is just what I cannot stand about her she is considered an icon. Whenever I read about Audrey Hepburn her acting always comes second it is about how she was a fashion icon or represented a new generation or things like that. I will say that I found her entertaining in the film and she was perfect for the role but I will not say that she was amazing or anything.

 

 

 

            George Peppard was so handsome. This is the only film I have ever seen him but I thought he was good. Every time I took a good look at his face I could not get over how much Michael Weatherly from NCIS and Kean Egan from Westlife look like him!! If Hollywood ever decides to be complete assholes and remake the film they can cast either guy in the role of Paul!

 

            Breakfast at Tiffany’s is a good, enjoyable film. I will admit I liked it enough to buy it on DVD and do watch it occasionally with friends. I do find it to be made too much of, to me it is not that great to warrant it to be considered so iconic. Although Audrey Hepburn is not my favorite actress ever I do like her here. The story is good too. I read that the film version is a watered down version of the book. The film hints that Holly is a paid companion Truman Capote the book’s author does not hide that fact about the character.

            Breakfast at Tiffany’s is a film that everyone should see at least once since it is very well known.

            

Roman Holiday (1953)

“Joe, we can't go running around town with a hot princess!” 

            One of my goals in life is to travel to Italy. My art history loving heart would DIE to visit Florence and Rome. I love Renaissance art and the art of the Vatican, they are where my love for art got its start. Whenever I watch the fabulous film Roman Holiday my dreaming of Rome takes flight. I would love to be able to spend the day like Gregory Peck and Audrey Hepburn do wandering around Rome to whatever places on a whim and not having a care in the world.

            Hepburn is Princess Ann of an unknown European country. She is in Italy as part of a good will tour. She is a proper beautiful young woman. At the end of her long tiring day Ann has a break down, she is sick of having a schedule and having to be nice to people and have others wait on her hand and foot. She wants to go out and live and see the sites that she wants to see.

 

            Ann makes her escape by jumping into a truck. She is excited by what she sees in the nighttime streets. But unfortunately she is feeling the effects of the medicine the doctor gave her to make her go to sleep and she lays down on a wall. A man named Joe Bradley (Peck) comes to her rescue. Joe thinks Ann is a little drunk because she is still high off the sleeping drug and cannot keep her eyes open. He gets her in a cab and asks her where she lives but she does not say. Joe wants to get out but the cab driver will not let him leave her alone seemingly drunk in the car. So now Joe takes her to his apartment, gives her his pajamas for the night, and she sleeps in his couch.

 

 

            The next morning in the paper there is an announcement sent out by Ann’s advisors that she has come down with a sudden illness and will not be greeting the press to cover up her disappearance. Joe realizes that the princess is sleeping on his couch in his pajamas. He is a reporter so he shoots down to his office telling his boss he has a way that he can get the best scoop of Princess Ann that no one else will be able to get. Joe does not tell his boss exactly how is going about to get this scoop but with some pay negotiations he tells Joe to go ahead.

            When he gets home Ann is now fast asleep on his bed. She wakes up and freaks out not knowing where she is and especially because there is a man in the room and a man has never seen her not in a dress. After she gets ready Ann leaves but Joe follows her. She walks down the street looking into store windows and stops in front of a barber shop. Ann comes out with much shorter hair and continues enjoying her freedom.

 

            Ann stops for a gelati and sits down on the Spanish Steps. Joe is still following her and pretends he just casually passes her by and recognizes her. From this time to the end of the film they spend the day together having a great time traveling on a Vespa, going out dancing, and even taking an impromptu dip in the Arno. Also along for the day is Joe’s photographer friend Irving (Eddie Albert) whom he has promised to split the money with.

 

 

            At the end of the film Joe does not write up the scoop because he loves Ann.

            Audrey Hepburn and Gregory Peck were wonderful together. This was Hepburn’s first leading role and her big break. Actresses should only wish they had a great break out role like Hepburn’s. She was adorable and so genuine as Ann. Peck was outrageously handsome and cute as Joe. They had great such great chemistry, it was not romantic chemistry it was just a nice lovable chemistry which makes their characters that much more enjoyable to watch. Peck told the producers that Hepburn was going to win an Oscar because she was so good and that they should put her name above his and he wound up being right.

 

            Roman Holiday is so much fun to watch. This is one film I can watch over and over and turn into a complete girl wishing I could find a man like Joe and just have a nice carefree time wandering around Rome for the day. I would love to get a gelati and go dancing on the Arno with a handsome man! One of the reasons I love Roman Holiday is because there is no drama between the characters it is just a fun, sweet, adorable film.

 

Wait Until Dark (1967)

“All right, all right you can have it... you can have the doll! I'll give it to you... if you'll... if you'll just go and... and...  Not hurt me.”

            I love a good thriller. If done right thrillers can send chills up your spine and make you think twice about everything and everyone in your life. Hitchcock is undoubtedly the master of thrillers since his films usually have me on edge and curled in a ball the entire time. But sometimes thrillers can fall short which is how I felt about Wait Until Dark.

            When he was in the airport Sam Hendrix was given a doll by a woman claiming that the doll was for her sick daughter but she did not want her other kid to be jealous so she wants him to take it for a while. But when the woman does not come back he goes home with the doll. When he gets home to New York to his wife Susy (Audrey Hepburn) he tells her the story.

            While both Susy and Sam are out three men get into their apartment. Mike Talman and Carlino are both men for hire. They have been summoned to the apartment by a man named Harry Roat (Alan Arkin). Roat wants the doll for the drugs that are hidden it. Roat’s plans to get the doll center around the fact that Susy is blind. This fact will make it easier to find the doll since she cannot identify them and will not know what they are doing.

            Mike tells Susy that he is a friend of Sam’s from the army. Once this happens their plan works for a while until Susy catches on by the sound of Roat’s shoes when he comes down the stairs. They terrorize her but she gets back at Roat when he comes by himself by making the entire room dark as she sees the world.

            The plot sounds intriguing and very thrilling (if I was good at explaining it) but I was not sitting on the edge of my seat like I was meant to be. First off I do not even know why I sat through this because I cannot stand Audrey Hepburn. She has just always driven me up a wall and I do not care for her acting at all. People make too big a deal about her in my opinion. The story was written for the stage by the same writer who created Dial M For Murder. Besides Audrey Hepburn being the film maybe I did not think it was a good thriller because Hitchcock did not direct it (although I believe he did want Hepburn for a film that was never realized… thank God for that). Dial M For Murder was a great story and I can see it being excellent on the stage but Wait Until Dark just lacked the former’s suspense. I will say Alan Arkin was a creepy bastard he was the only good aspect of the film.

            Wait Until Dark was alright I did like the plot but if you have seen Dial M For Murder you may know what is coming and it is pretty much the same concept just with a couple of different elements. I say just sit through it for Alan Arkin he was incredible and if you are an Audrey Hepburn fan. Skip otherwise.

            

Sabrina (1954)

The plot to Sabrina is nothing new. A young girl named Sabrina Fairchild (Audrey Hepburn) lives with her chauffer father on the estate of the Larrabee family. Ever since she was little Sabrina has had an unrequited crush on the youngest son David (William Holden). David is the typical rich playboy who can have any woman he wants and has been married three times. He never really takes notice of Sabrina since she is just a young girl and the daughter of a member of the help. Sabrina follows David around during a party watching him dance with a rich, pretty young woman.

            Sabrina is sent off to Paris to attending a cooking school for three years. While away she longs for David so much that her cooking suffers. When she returns home her father is late to pick her up from the train station. David is driving home past the station when he sees Sabrina but does not even recognize her he just saw a beautiful girl and picked her up. Now David is totally head over heels for her and she could not imagine anything better.

            The rest of the family are not as happy as David is about his new object of affection. His older brother Linus (Humphrey Bogart) has arranged for business for David to marry so the families’ companies can merge. Linus does everything he can to make sure that Sabrina and his brother are kept apart but not shockingly Linus begins to fall for the young girl himself.

            I was not particularly thrilled with the plot I feel like I have seen it a hundred times in movies. I also did not particularly care for the cast. William Holden I think was a great actor and so was Humphrey Bogart but I think they were both terribly miscast. Bogart was fifty-five he was way too old to be Audrey Hepburn’s man at the end. I did like seeing Bogart in a light role but it would have been better had he gotten his way and Lauren Bacall had been cast or someone close to his age. Holden would have been the better choice to play Linus and someone younger than him cast to play David. Audrey Hepburn never impresses me in any film I see her in. I cannot tell you exactly why I do not like Audrey Hepburn I cannot put my finger on it. I do not find her acting that great all but I do respect her as a style icon.

          Speaking of style, Edith Head is given credit as costume designer for the film and even won an Academy Award for it but it was actually Hubert de Givenchy who designed the costumes for Audrey Hepburn. Her outfits and gowns are absolutely stunning in this film. 

            Sabrina is a cute, light film. It is a great classic film which I cannot see why because of the boring, overused plot and the casting but I would not say to blow it off and never see it.