Johnny Dangerously (1984)

“The name's Dangerously. Johnny Dangerously.”
“Did you know you're last name is an adverb?” 

            Johnny Dangerously is a movie I have seen so many times but only in bits and pieces and always near the end. I was taking a look through my brother’s DVDs and came across this so I finally got to sit through the whole thing. Johnny Dangerously just proves my point that old spoof movies are the best and the new ones that come out today are complete crap.

            The movie is told through a flashback by Johnny after a kid tries to steal a dog from his pet shop. He starts out how he was an immigrant kid named Johnny Kelly living in the Lower East side as a paper boy with his Irish mother and his younger brother Tommy. One day a rich guy stops his car and asks Johnny if he would like to make fifty bucks to help him out with some dirty work. Johnny at first declines but then he agrees after his mom needs an operation that costs $49.95 discounted.

            After Johnny helps the man named Jocko Dundee (Peter Boyle) he stays on with the gang but never tells his mother or brother while everyone else in the neighborhood knows what he does. His mother and brother think he runs a night club. Jocko gets a close call when he toilet explodes so he decides to retire and leave Johnny in charge of the gang. Johnny’s old enemy Danny Vermin (Joe Piscopo) and all he wants to do is kill people and cause havoc while Johnny wants to keep a low profile.

            Things are made worse for Johnny after Tommy is made the new assistant DA and eventually becomes DA who promises to fight crime. Tommy does fight crime and cleans every organization out including Jocko’s enemy Moronie who “murders the English language.” Vermin finds out about Johnny and Tommy being brothers and frames Johnny for murder. Johnny is found guilty but he tells them his cigarette case that holds bubblegum is missing and whoever has the case is the real murderer. Tommy knows his brother is innocent and does all he can as the DA to help him out.

            A few of Johnny’s friends and his girl Lil spring him out of jail and prove his innocence.

            The whole movie is a fantastic spoof. There are so many jokes that are not even silly they are just great. Moronie literally murders the English language instead of saying “assholes” he says “iceholes” and instead of saying the F-word he says “fargin” and makes several other mistakes that are hilarious. I greatly enjoyed all the references, spoof, and clichés of old films because they are all so true.

            The whole cast is excellent. Michael Keaton is so believable as a the gangster who is deep down a really good guy. Joe Piscopo is a nut his running thing is if someone, say, punched him he would say someone punched him once and repeat “once” as if he had done something to make them never do it again. Maureen Stapleton as Ma Kelly was the best she was so funny because you would almost never expect her to say half the things she says and a lot of what she said was dirty.

            Johnny Dangerously is a spoof film and one of the best. I love spoof films like this because they are clever and subtle as well as funny and silly. Today’s spoof movies are just ridiculous and over the top and in your face. I cannot even begin to say what my favorite part of the movie was because the whole thing was just hysterical, I laughed the entire time from beginning to the very end.