Heathers (1988)

“Dear Diary, my teen-angst bullshit now has a body count.”

            Heathers is a movie I have heard of over the years and seen clips of on TV. The one scene I always wind up seeing on clip shows of the 80s is when Wynonna Rider puffing on a cigarette looking like she got burned with her hair and clothes all messy and someone telling her she looks like hell and then she replies “Yeah? I just got back.” From seeing that scene over again I had to watch the movie. Also I heard it was Mean Girls in the 80s… in a way Heathers is but not as funny and not as well put together. They should not be compared though that would be wrong since they were made sixteen years apart and obviously things have changed.

            Veronica Sawyer (Rider) is a rich girl living in Ohio. She became part of a clique consisting of three other girls all with the first name Heather. Veronica cannot stand these girls whatsoever she usually snarks about them and does not tolerate most of their bullshit. The head bitch in charge of the clique is Heather Chandler. She gets on Veronica’s nerves the most because there is no reason for Heather to be so cruel.

            At lunch one day Veronica notices a new guy. She goes up to him and finds out his name is JD (Christian Slater). She likes him because he has the same sarcastic and snarky attitude like her.

            At a party with Heather Chandler at a college frat house, Veronica drinks too much and throws up. Heather is furious with her for ruining the fun. Veronica tells JD about this and comes up with the idea that she would love to make Heather throw up so she could know what it feels like to be humiliated in some way. JD wants to put the plan into action. Veronica takes him to Heather’s house one Sunday since she knows her nasty friend will be home alone. They go through the kitchen trying to think of things that will make Heather throw up. JD finds some poison. He thinks it’s a good idea while Veronica does not want to go that far. They go into Heather’s room and of course she acts like a total monster. JD hands her the cup and she grasps for air until she falls over onto a glass coffee table. He killed her. Veronica is furious and elated at the same time. She fakes Heather’s handwriting and writes a suicide note.

            The next day the whole school is upset. All the students and teachers make Heather out to be some martyr which is exactly what Veronica did not want to happen.

            Soon Veronica’s anger mixed with her love and hate for JD brings the body count and suicide rate of the school up. And then the story just starts slipping a little far from where it had started.

            Heathers started out as a darkly funny twisted comedy and then it just got weird and serious. It really is not until the last minute that the movie goes back to where it had started. The acting is not good it sounds like everyone just repeated their lines and did not act them out but at the same time it added some humor and campiness. I have to say I wish teen movies could be made like this with dark funny humor. Today teen movies are either too silly or too serious there is no in between. Most of the lingo is very eighties but I found some of it totally hilarious. I was dying with the line “Well, fuck me gently with a chainsaw. Do I look like Mother Teresa?”. I cannot tell you why that struck me as being so funny it just did. I did also like some of the costumes, most of the outfits are back in style at the time of this writing. Heathers is an eighties teen movie I recommend seeing. I feel like it is essential viewing for movie fans.