Silent Sundays: It's the Old Army Game (1926)

It’s The  Old Army Game is a kind of silent film where there is apparently a plot but it just seems like there are several short stories running throughout it. There are several comical situations and then thrown in there is a pieced together story.

            The film manly deals with the character of Elmer Prettywillie (W.C. Fields). Elmer is a druggist in a small Florida town. All day and all night people come to him for their ails and wants. One morning a woman incessantly rings the bell to the store. It takes Elmer a few minutes to get out of his deep sleep and get himself together to go downstairs. The pain in the rear woman just wanted a stamp and she does not even pay him the two cents. She gets all the way down the train station in a huff and misses the mail train. She goes downtown and thinks she is putting the letter in a mailbox when it is really the alarm for the fire department. The box alerts the fire department to Elmer’s store. All the firefighters show up and stay even though there is no fire. They stay because Elmer has a pretty young woman named Marilyn Sheridan (Louise Brooks) working for him. All the fire fighters stay around to have a float with her. Elmer manages to get everyone out by setting off another box but he should have kept them around because when he gets back a box of cigars has caught fire!

            In between the beginning and where the, probably, main part of the plot picks up is just some comedic moments. There is one where Elmer is given charge of watching a neighbor’s baby and he just hilarious fumbles with it. Another one has his nephew bugging the garbage out him.

            The big story comes in the form of a New Yorker named William Parker. On the train he gives a speech about how he is selling land in New York for a good price and if people buy the land they will become rich. The train he is on stops in the town Elmer is from. He gets off the train to send a letter but winds up missing it because he sees Marilyn sitting with her aunt in the station. Marilyn sees him staring at her and she leads him on a teasing chase around town. Parker sets up his business in Elmer’s shop at Marilyn’s insistence. Parker makes Elmer his vice president in the land selling.  

            Back in New York City, some detectives are sent to find Parker for being involved in some land scam. They find him and arrest him and the whole town is furious. Elmer drives up to New York City to find Parker to clear things up. Due to some silly circumstances, such as his whole catching fire, Elmer never finds Parker and he is forced to go home. He decides the best thing to do is turn himself to the police back home. He does go to the station but he finds out that Parker is innocent (he had to if he was going to marry the girl at the end) and was roped into the scam and also that all the land that was sold and bought made a lot of people rich.

            It’s The Old Army Game was alright. It got boring after a while. It felt like some of the scenes and jokes just dragged when they could have been much shorter. This was the first time I ever watched a W.C. Fields films. He was funny I liked his gags. The only complaint was that his character was inconsistent he started off as a push over and then just seemed to change with every scene. Louise Brooks is barely in it and I am sure she was just in it for her name and to some femininity to the story. I will suggest seeing It’s The Old Army Game if you are a fan of either W.C. Fields or Louise Brooks otherwise skip it.   

Silent Sundays: Pandora's Box (1929)

“Beware of that woman”

            Pandora’s Box is a film that I have had saved for quite some time. I started watching it maybe two years ago when I was at college and never went back to it. I remember sitting down to watch the film I was just beginning to really dig into classic films but I had yet to sit through a silent film. I thought at the time I would give Pandora’s Box a try since I heard it was a great classic among silent films and Louise Brooks’ best film. I think I got about twelve minutes in and I never went back to it. Now I have finally gotten back to the film after two years since I now have an appreciation and liking for silent films. I found the film way too long and it took me a few sittings to get through it.

            Lulu (Brooks) is a kept woman. She lives in an apartment that is paid for by a Dr. Schon. Lulu was a dancer at a revue when she met Schon. Schon comes to the apartment and announces that he has become engaged to another woman. He also tells her their relationship is the talk of town and ruining his reputation. Lulu tells him “You’ll have to kill me if you want to be free of me.” She tells him this very seductively and they kiss.

            Charlotte is the name of the woman Schon is engaged to. Her father tells her that Schon’s behavior makes the marriage impossible but she does not listen to him even though the wedding keeps getting postponed.

            Lulu goes to see Schon. His son Alwa is there. She tells Alwa that he is her best friend because he does not want anything from her then questions if it is because he does not love her. Schon comes in and demands to know why she is in his house. Lulu does not answer she takes Alwa and kisses him. When Lulu leaves Schon gives Alwa the idea to put on a revue and have Lulu as the star.

            Schon goes backstage at the revue and brings Charlotte. When Lulu sees them she refuses to go on stage and dance for Charlotte’s amusement. Everyone tries to get some sense into her. Schon takes her into a storage closet and will not let her out until she agrees to go out. Lulu keeps and screams to let her out and to leave her alone. Schon takes Lulu into his arms and kisses her. At that moment Alwa opens the door with Charlotte as his side. Lulu gives an evil smirk as if to say she has won. Schon says that now he will have to marry Lulu.

            On the day of the wedding Schon is not happy at all while Lulu is. Two of her old friends Schigolch and Rodrigo are at the wedding. They go into her room and she sits on Schigolch’s lap. Schon walks in on this scene. He takes out his gun to shoot the two men but Lulu intervenes. Schigolch and Rodrigo run out with Schon chasing them into the wedding party. After this scene the guests leave the house. Schon with gun still in hand forces Lulu to hold it. He wants her to kill herself so that he will not be called a murderer alone. They struggle for the gun and it goes off killing Schon.

            Lulu is arrested and tried for the murder of Dr. Schon. One of the prosecutors likens Lulu to the mythical Pandora who opened a box and let loose evil into the world. He tells the court that Lulu made Dr. Schon evil. Despite testimony from Alwa and his friend in defense of Lulu the jury still sentences her to five years in prison. Schigolch and Rodrigo have the fire alarm go off and the court cleared out. Lulu gets carried away with the crowd.

            Lulu goes to Dr. Schon’s house. Alwa wants to hate her but he cannot and he takes her away to Paris. Schigolch and Rodrigo join the trip as well.

            Lulu and Alwa’s lives begin to fall apart. They get blackmailed and lose money and wind up jumping ship on a small boat to London.

            Louise Brookes was the first choice to play Lulu but G.W. Pabst was unsure whether he could get her or not. Apparently Marlene Dietrich was sitting in his office waiting to sign the contract to be in the film when Pabst got the call that Paramount would release Brookes to make the film. Brookes was perfect in the role. She was not gorgeous she was pretty and had a charm that makes her believable that men would do to their demise and turn evil because of her. I can see why this made her so famous and is considered her best film.

            Pandora’s Box is a good film but I found it to be way too long. The story is excellent I loved the line when the prosecutor tells the room that he compares Lulu to Pandora and made Schon evil. That right there sums up the whole character. I found like a lot of early epic silent films like D.W. Griffith’s films that there were so many scenes that were unnecessary and made the film too long. Several aspects make Pandora’s Box one of the quintessential silent films and German films especially the dark message and the Expressionist style. The film definitely deserves to be one of the best it has a great cast, great story and a great director in G.W. Pabst. Just remember if you ever sit down to watch it that it does drag in some parts. 

Silent Sundays: A Girl in Every Port (1928)

“Pounding up and down the seas-dodging into ports- a tramp schooner.”

            Before watching A Girl in Every Port I had no idea Howard Hawks ever made a silent film. I am so used to seeing his sound films like Bringing Up Baby, The Big Sleep, and To Have and Have Not I never even realized the man most likely made silent films. He did but only a few and A Girl in Every Port is one of them. From the beginning you can tell this is a Howard Hawks film from its story to its comedic situations.

            Sailor Spike Madden (Victor McLaglen) takes his ship all over the world to hundreds of different ports. Whatever port Spike makes it his mission to get a girl. Some of the ports he has a girl waiting for him. In the Netherlands his girl he met a few years before is now married with a family. In a matter of seconds he has forgotten about the old girl and eyes a new one. Spike and the girl go out for a bike ride to the country. He sees the girl is wearing a bracelet with a heart charm that has an anchor in the middle. Spike gets mad he has been seeing the symbol in the ports he has recently been to, he sees this guy as stealing his girls.

            Spike finally catches up to the guy) whose name is Bill (Robert Armstrong) in Central America. They meet in a bar by accident when they argue over a girl. Both sailors get into a huge brawl to where the guards are called in. Bill and Spike have a mutual dislike of the guards so they beat up the guards together, they go back to fighting each other, and then the army is brought in. Spike and Bill get thrown in jail when Spike sees the heart and anchor mark on his chin from Bill’s ring. He is the one who has been beating Spike to all the ports and taking his women!

            The men are set to be released from jail if they can pay a fine. Spike pays but Salami has no money. Spike paysBill’s fine which he only paid because he wanted to punch Bill’s face in. They walk the streets looking for a place to fight but everywhere they go guards are there. They finally get to a wharf and they fall in the water. Spike panics because he cannot swim. Bill saves him and from this the two men become best friends. From this moment on they are inseparable and become shipmates.

            On their way to France Bill gets laid up with a toothache leaving Spike alone to look for women and have some fun. Spike goes to a circus where he sees a beautiful girl named Marie (Louise Brooks). Marie is a diver in an act where she accidentally splashes Spike- well, he was standing too close. She has him come back to her at her tent where she offers to dry his coat. That night he takes Marie out on a date through the park. Spike has been thinking about settling down and he thinks he has found just the girl to settle down with. She says she is open to try it out. Spike tells Bill that he does not want to sail he wants to stay in France with Marie. Bill says his latest “skirt” cannot be that great. Bill leaves but then comes back saying he really does not think Spike’s latest “skirt” is a tramp. And also he cannot sail without his best friend.

            Spike takes Marie to meet Bill. He goes out leaving his girl and best friend alone. We find out Bill this “skirt” when she worked at Coney Island and to top everything off she has his mark tattooed on her arm. Marie keeps going after Bill but he does everything he can to try to convince her that he cannot hurt his best friend. One night Spike comes home to find Marie alone in the apartment and Bill missing from his bed. Spike fuming goes to find his friend who is at a bar getting the crap beat out of him by some locals. Spike saves him.

            Spike does not stay mad at Bill too long. They promise to not let any women come between them again.

            The cast was very good. Victor McLaglen and Robert Armstrong were very believable as former rivals who become best friends. McLaglen comes off as kind of a big goof especially after he meets Marie but that is what makes you like the character. Louise Brooks just steals her scenes because she just had this magnetism to her you could not look away when she came on screen. Robert Armstrong I liked because I did have to listen him to talk! Whenever I watch King Kong I want to punch him in the face after a while to make him stop talking! But the guy was a good actor even if he did talk fast and annoying. According to IMDB Armstrong’s character is supposed to be named Salami but I clearly saw that he name was Bill. I will say his name is Bill because Salami is just weird. Apparently Myrna Loy is in this film somewhere. She is supposed to be a girl in a Chinese port but I do not think there was a scene where either Spike or Bill were in China. I could not have been paying attention that is very possible with me. 

            A Girl in Every Port is every frame a Howard Hawks film. There are some funny moments especially with Bill and Spike trying to start fights with people around them and there are some but not many serious moments. A Girl in Every Port is very an entertaining silent with a good cast and a fun story. 

Silent Sundays: Love 'Em and Leave 'Em (1926)

“Love ‘em and leave ‘em- That’s me”

            There really is not much to say on the plot of Love ‘Em and Leave ‘Em. To me it is a typical plot of silent and early talking films.

            Mame Walsh (Evelyn Brent) promised her mother before her death that she would look after her younger sister Janie (Louise Brooks). Mame does her best but Janie is the typical wild flapper of the era going out dancing all night and smoking and drinking. Janie comes home early in the morning after worrying her older sister all night. She is in no way responsible but manages to hold down a job in a department store with Mame and Bill the guy Mame is sweet on and lives in the same building.

            At work Mame helps Bill to dress a new window. The head of the window department really likes what Bill has done and has him switched over to his department. Meanwhile Janie has been put in charge of the treasury for the Employee Welfare League. A dance is coming up soon and she collects a hundred dollars. Janie gambles as well and she puts all the money down on horses through a neighbor. The neighbor is no good and when Janie wins he steals the money.

            Mame goes on vacation for a week by herself. She has Janie work with Bill. During their time working together Bill falls for Janie even though he had asked Mame to marry him. When she comes back she wants to surprise Bill and tell him she will marry him but her surprise backfires when she sees her sister and her lover walk into his room together. To top everything off Janie lets the head of the Employee Welfare League think Mame stole the money and used it. Now Mame has to try to get her money back from the corrupt neighbor.

            All works out in the end with Mame foolishly going back to Bill.

            Blah blah blah. I was a bit bored with Love ‘Em and Leave ‘Em. The only reason I watched it was to see Louise Brooks who was not even really worth it. But I will say that Brooks had magnetic charm the camera just loved her. She was the ideal modern flapper and she did that wonderfully in the party scene at the end. Evelyn Brent was not too great but she was not awful. You can tell she was the older sister she looked. Love ‘Em and Leave ‘Em is good to watch to see the clothing and sets from the 1920s but other than those things and a nineteen year old Louise Brooks it is just an old silent without real drawing power.